Author: An Errant Dev

At work, we’ve had a project that has been on a deadline. However, a couple weeks out – we started to realize we weren’t going to make it. I hated to realize it and I hated to admit it to my boss. The project was just bigger than we thought it would be. We didn’t know that until it was too late because of poor planning up front – which was all on me.

My boss didn’t get all down on me or the team and we did get an extension – which was very nice. But now have to make sure we finish in the time allotted – no further extension – and that we do better next time.

The first thing, is to make sure the up front things happen. We have to do better defining everything we can. We are extremely busy and I am not a planner by nature – so this will take some work. I don’t really look forward to it. I just want to code!

But this is my job right now – so gotta do it, right?

Mentoring can be a powerful thing. Previously, all my “mentoring” opportunities were fairly informal – but mostly with people who have been in the same company. Those can be very useful but they are a bit constrained by their very nature. If you are in the same company – you can’t really tell them all the issues you may be having with coworkers or company policies.

With a mentor outside of your company, you can be fully engaged and be more honest about your goals or ambitions. It is easier to take advantage of the opportunity as much as possible – be open and admit your deeper concerns. With an outside person, you don’t have to guard your tongue against saying something which could hurt your standing in the company. You wouldn’t want to ask someone in your own organization “when is it time to jump ship?” or “how do I deal with my micro manager?”

In the last several months, my job has given some of us access to a service called Plato. They have software engineering, QA and product management mentors who they match up with mentees. The mentee is presented with a list of mentors and their attributes or specialties – subjects they focus on or have a lot of experience in. At the beginning – I really didn’t know what I was doing. I had a mentor who was great but after a few meetings I kind of ghosted. I let stress at work get to me and just let it slide. I still regret that -because I think she was awesome but didn’t suck it up and fix it.

For a second round or maybe it was a longer trial period – our company gained access to mentoring coaches. This was great – my coach helped me look through the available mentors and recommended a few. I was able to select two I thought might be a good fit. One is a software engineering manager, one is a product manager.

I really connected with one of them. I have been able to actually talk about things. She is kind of like a therapist light with a focus on managing my team and my career. I can tell she actually cares about people and we just talk about things. Sometimes I feel a bit whiny – but I have learned that I really am not the only one who is or has ever felt these feelings.

All the issues happening now – COVID-19, working from home, not seeing ANYONE, protests, presidential election – just add to the normal work pressures for me and for my team. My mentor and I have talked about everything from staying close to my team and how they are feeling to “when is it time to jump ship?” It is very liberating to get that out in a safe environment with someone whose only goal is to listen and give advice. And perhaps the answer is yes by needing to ask the question.

Any way – mentoring – 10/10 would recommend.

As the tagline says “I don’t know what I want to be when I grow up”. When I was in my 20s, I worked at a parcel delivery company, a long distance phone company, then the local library. I thought about going for a library degree because I love books but finally I went back to school in South Dakota (Go ‘Yotes!) for Computer Science. It was too far away from home & friends, so I came back & started working for a website – a cash back website. For the first 5 years, I was a customer service agent.

When we got acquired by another cash back site, I was hired to be a Junior Dev. We were acquired again and I have been promoted a few times along the way. Which is awesome and wonderful and I have learned so very much in the last 8 years. But being with the same company for 13 years – ok 3 companies but with all the same people – is a LONG time. I have been very lucky in coworkers – most have generously offered their knowledge.

But I am beginning to feel stuck – dead in the water. There is a lot of change going on – changes to organizational structure and several exits. We’ve gone to something called squads – and some people do not like the change at all. Honestly, it doesn’t feel that different from our old structure because our office has always been a bit independent. But now I sometimes feel that too much is being asked of us and we’re on our own. If I ask very explicitly – I am offered answers or assistance – which is great. But everyone else has their priorities and if I don’t know exactly what to ask – I am left in the cold. I don’t know how to make it better for myself or for my employees. Yep, they made me a manager and I don’t know what I am doing most of the time.

In the current climate, COVID-19 and social unrest, I want to do something more, BE something more. I don’t want to just exist anymore – going along with whatever is being asked. What does the next phase look like. Do I just take time off and worry about the rest later – I do have savings I could use to survive? Do I freelance – build a clientele? Do I work for myself – build a game or a site? I have a game that I am trying to build in React – maybe I can swing it into income. That would be epic but probably like playing the lottery – I would have to be very lucky. If I build a site – what does it do? But it feels a bit stupid to even contemplate all of this while the world is going through hell.

Also, I would like to relocate. I have been thinking of going south – get out of the snow. At least from this enforced social distancing we have all learned we can keep in touch with technology. So if I put all my stuff in storage and took Murdock to the Carolina coast, at least I could stay in touch. And plenty of jobs are offering remote – as we have proved in last few months that it is possible and sometimes preferable to work from home.

I know I need to move from my current apartment, because I didn’t re-sign the lease. I have been waffling between go and no-go. Do I rent an apartment here for a few months or do I go now before the snow inevitably comes. I can probably keep working my current job at least for awhile but…. do I want to?

If you got this far and didn’t bail from the whining – thanks!